From the outside looking in

For the past few weeks I have felt like an outsider in our neighborhood. Eric has been working a lot as a lifeguard and Mackenzie and I have been working hard on the house. We are just about ready to paint her big girl room and the baby's nursery. The only problem is I feel really alone. There are so many thoughts that go through my head in a day. I use to be able to talk to Eric about it all but now by the time he gets home I forget. Also I am struggling as I gain weight in my belly. I don't want to buy new maternity clothes for summer. You see, last time just wore pioneer clothes all during the summer but this time around I need summer clothes. I just don't want to spend the money. I also have never liked clothes shopping. I know I am a really, really weird girl. I am picky like my dad and practical like my mom. I do get a good work out at little gym with Mackenzie and during the week with doing laundry (we are starting to win that battle) and cleaning and organizing the house. Also Mackenzie loves to give mommy lovies so I am her jungle gym out home. But to be honest the only place I can tell all of this to is here. I miss some very dear friends who I use to be able to confide everything in. I just don't feel like I fit in. I love to cook, clean and I am crafting in my own way. I just don't feel like what things I can do are appreciated or needed in the neighborhood. There are so many other amazing women to do so much more. Oh, well if I am an outsider so be it. I will just keep doing what I do everyday and be grateful for the time that I have with my little growing family. They are truly what matter in this life along with the gospel that makes it to where these sweet relationships don't have to end at death.